Feb 11, 2007

Six Months Down, 55 Pounds To Go...

Dear Blog,
I am now 6 months into my third pregnancy and growing rapidly. The first few months of nausea and vomiting --which kept my weight gain minimal-- are now being generously off-set by a recent accelerated, but not unfamiliar, craving. The craving now threatening to take over every moment of my free time and cause a 75 pound total pregnancy weight gain is for....

Now, sugar and I have always had a bit of a love/hate relationship. (Cue song: "I Love to Hate You" by Erasure.) As a hypoglycemic, any sugar over-dose I may indulge in generally ends in pain and suffering. Or more specifically, extreme lethargy and crankiness which is mostly painful to those around me. Of course, if my sugar indulgence happens to coincide with an empty stomach, vomiting and coma are the likely and usual results.

So imagine my glee when during my first four months of this pregnancy, the very thought of ice cream made me sick and all I wanted (if I wanted anything at all) were large chunks of red meat followed by any artery-clogging, heart attack-inducing side dish. (Read: French Fries)

Lucky me! This meant my baby was getting plenty of protein (and sodium and fat, but whatever...) and I didn't have to feel guilty for eating more servings of dessert than of vegetables on a daily basis!

Alas, all that has changed and my longing for the sweet stuff has taken over both mind and body. Currently, sugar in almost any form will do. If my body tells me to eat a spoonful (or three) of brown sugar, I just do it. Obviously, if I'm craving it, it's because the baby needs it! (Why else would I have ever craved tuna fish or egg salad?)

Unfortunately, more and more often lately, Baby and body have become more demanding. Although a handful of chocolate chips or large chunk of frozen cookie dough can partially satisfy, often I find a desperate need for something more. Something, in fact, homemade and baked.

It seems in the last week or two, not a day goes by when I don't have the desire to bake some divine dessert. Usually, the only thing that can stop me is still having left-overs from the last bake fest or lack of a key ingredient. This is why in the last few days I've consumed approximately 10 sugar cookies (all yesterday morning at a birthday party) half of a Chocolate Mousse Cake and at least 38 Lemon Bars. It's also why, now that I've polished off the last of the Lemon Bars, I'll be making Tollhouse Cookie Bars this afternoon. (I'm only writing to you, Dear Blog, because the butter needs to soften.)

Don't pity me. Although I'm sacrificing my health and sweet temper, it's all for the greater good: I'm keeping Baby #3 happy and satisfied. If you'd like to show your support, please join me as I gorge myself into yet another coma. Here's a little help to get you started:

Best Lemon Bars Ever

1 cup butter or margarine, softened
1/2 cup powdered sugar
2 cups flour

4 eggs, beaten
2 cups granulated sugar
1/2 cup lemon juice
5 Tbsp. flour
1 tsp. baking powder

Crust: Beat butter, powdered sugar, and 2 cups flour together until smooth. Spread into a greased 9x13 pan; bake at 350 for 20 minutes.

Filling: Beat together the eggs, granulated sugar, lemon juice, 5 Tbsp. flour, and baking powder until well blended; the mixture will be thin. Pour over the top of the baked crust, and continue baking at 350 for 25 minutes. Sprinkle with powdered sugar, cool, and cut into bars.

I'll let you know how the Tollhouse Cookie Bars turn out! Happy eating!


mr. underhill said...

Erasuer should never be "qued." The only time it would even remotely be legal would be at a stake dance and/or a 80’s high school reunion. Please feel free to enjoy the hideous sounds of said band if you find yourself present at either of the previously listed events. If not, please do the rest of your household a favor and refrain from polluting the air with such horrific, narcoleptic sounds. Your children thank you, your husband thanks you and most importantly I thank you.

The Queen said...

I found you through Stephanie's blog. She's my sister's sil. Love this post. So funny! And unfortunately, all too familiar. ;)

Linz said...

Okay - I need clarification (I am a sufferer of pregnancy brainloss... have you gained 75 pounds already, or 20 pounds - thus the 55 pounds to go? If you have indeed gained 75, I don't believe it and need to see a picture! I mean come on, that would what - double your normal weight? Anyway, great post! You are so funny! Take care of baby and yourself with as much sugar as possible! And post a belly picture anyway... I would like to compare! =)

Bartimaeus said...

Need a protein snack?

P.S. I threw away the last Lemon Bar. (Sometimes I try to defy the large amounts of candy/sweets/other high fructose items around our house)

Sarah said...

Just make sure you have someone around so when you go into a sugar coma they can drive you to the hospital while pouring liquid sugar into your mouth.

That recipe for lemon bars looks so easy! I've got to try it. My third trimester baby is getting sick of the Costco Chocolate Calcium Chews that I keep giving it to trick it into silence.

Anonymous said...

Wow, I totally know what you're talking about! I'm trying to resist the sugar, but usually I give in. Oh sugar!

Anonymous said...

I love your sugary rantings, but I'm afraid that sugar is not our friend.
I'm pretty sure it damages our immune system, but I still eat it.
I'm positive that it does brain damage, but I can't remember why I should care.
I want you to do better than I have in later years!
Love, Mom xoxoxoxox

Anonymous said...

Back Off the White Stuff Emmy! We don't need another hyperactive grandchild in this family. We need sweet, calm, obedience. Well, maybe the saturation of said yummy baked goods will lull Him into a the quiet child we all long for. Pass the chocolate molten cake please.