Feb 5, 2014

Lots of Love

My e-mail in-box is out of control. It's constantly full of junk and spam and stuff I think I'll get to later.  It desperately needs to be cleaned out--but, since I have slight hoarder tendencies, I have a hard time throwing things away.  Even virtual things.
(What if I need that 20%-off-at-Michaels coupon for a craft I'm going to start next month but not complete until October 2017?!?! WHAT IF???)

Tonight I opened g-mail to see yet another ad from Old Navy.  Didn't I just get one, like, yesterday???
I typed "Old Navy" into my search box, checked "select all" and deleted 20 Old Navy e-mails.  Safe to say I wont need any of those in the future. I did it again and again until they were all gone.  I thought of what else might be eating up my allotment of Cloud and searched for Target.com.  I clicked "select all" but noticed one of the e-mails wasn't from Target.  It was from my mom.  I clicked it open.

It was my mom responding to a blog post written just before I left Japan. (Somewhere in the post I had mentioned my excessive use of Target.com while overseas.)  We went back and forth talking about my family and my excitement and anxiety surrounding coming back to The States. She praised my writing. She said she was excited to see me again. She reassured me. And she chided me for bagging on my family in the blog post.  ;)

I could hear her voice saying the words. It was like she was still here.
Just on the other end of an e-mail.  Just separated by a plane ride.
She signed the e-mails the same way she always did:
"Lots of Love, Mom xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo"
{One of her Aunties signed letters "Lots of Love" so my mom did too.}

I wonder how many e-mails I have from her?  I want to check.  But I can't check.
Not yet.  Cause then I'll have to read 'em.  And I'm not ready to read 'em.

But it's nice to remember they're there.  With all those x's and o's.
Some things are worth keeping.

Lots of Love Mommy!  Lots and lots and lots of love!

P.S.  This is the post she was responding too--if you're curious:  http://actegratuit.blogspot.com/2011/05/my-head-and-my-heart-all-over-place.html

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