Hmpff!

Max: "Thanks for the yummy dinner, Mom!"

Me: *gush* "You're welcome, Sweetie!!!"

Max: "I didn't really like it, but I knew I had to eat it..."

(for more great Max quotes, see Doug's blog.)

New Years 2000

Recently my nightstand was tossed by a five-year-old in search of mischief. In the process, he opened and emptied my scriptures and scripture bag. (Evidence also points to a two-year-old accomplice who fled the scene before law enforcement arrived.) This set was one of my High School graduation gifts from Faezer and has been accumulating notes, churchy hand-outs, and scraps of paper ever since June of 1996.

Among the pile of non-gospel related items were; a list of E-mail addresses, a shopping list, a list of party invitees (and if they were coming or not) and most interesting, my New Years Resolutions for 2000. I'd like to list a few of them as I believe they exhibit my extreme maturity at the young age of 21.

1. Eat dessert daily.
2. Date a lot.
3. 100% attendance @ school.
(I really wish I'd kept track of how long this one lasted)
4. Gain weight .
(This seems strange only because it's been edited by my husband. The actual resolution states the precise area of my body where I wanted to gain the weight...but doesn't specify how I might accomplish this goal.)
5. Don't get engaged.
(Prompted by the breaking of a previous engagement on Christmas Day 1999. I kept this resolution until exactly June 10th. Hey, half a year ain't bad!)
6. Date more/kiss less
(needs no explanation.)
7. Make bed daily.
(Crossed off...maybe just to be more realistic?)
8. Learn to play chess.
(Makes it on the list almost every year. I have been taught once or twice, but never remember the rules for more than 20 minutes.)
9. Kiss someone new every month.
(I guess I'd forgotten about Res. #6 by the time I got to this one.)

Now we switch over to my roommate, Michelle's (aka P.B.'s) handwriting and she notes some of her personal requests for my (hopeful) behavior modifications. (Do more dishes?!? Que va!)

At #14, I steal the pen back and take over again. I guess I was starting to feel a little shallow because I list a few serious things like "read scriptures," "learn French," and "get straight A's". I finally wrap-up with #24 "Make 20 new friends."

I'm not sure what this says about my character (though I have a clue) but I do think it's probably for the best that I was married by that August.

Pretty much every aspect of my life has changed since those long ago days (fortunately) but surprisingly, I still follow through with one of those worthy goals: "Eat dessert daily". The one area where I never fail to succeed!

And really...what's more important than that?!?

Everybody loves Earl (don't they?)

Earl’s mom drives up to their house with Randy and sees her husband (Earl's Dad) throwing gerbils out the second floor window:

“Oh dear...your father’s blood sugar must be low again…
CARL! EAT AN ORANGE! EAT AN ORANGE!!!”

"So Emily, How Are You Feeling?"

Answers: (pick one)

1st Trimester:

"Nauseated!"
"Tired. I'm going back to bed."
"Severely Depressed."
"Why can't everyone just go away and leave me alone!?!?!?!?!?"

2nd Trimester:

"Great!"
"SO MUCH BETTER!"
"Really, really hungry! Can I have some of what you're having?"
"Fabulous! Want to frolic through this flower field with me???"

3rd Trimester:

"Large and in charge!"
"Waddle-y"
"Cumbersome"
"Ungainly"
"Uncomfortable"
"Klutzy"
"Ready to pop"
"Pregnant!"
"Please quit asking and get me an epidural immediately."

And still 11 weeks to go...

Max quote: "Can't you just push the baby out WIGHT NOW?"

If only...

It's Sixes...

I was "tagged" by Fabulous Photographer Jen to do a post about 6 things that make me happy and 6 weird things about me. Well, there are lots of things that make me happy and far more than 6 weird things about me so I'll just type until my fingers blister...

Weirdness:

1. I have no lateral incisors. Those are the teeth on either side of your two front teeth. (Evidently, this isn't that weird according to Doug.) I was missing one permanent tooth and the Orthodontist yanked the other one and pushed everything together.


2. I HAVE to sleep with socks on and with two or more pillows or I can't fall asleep.

3. I never pierced my tongue (like Jen) but I did have three earrings in each ear until November 2000. I know. That isn't really weird, though I did want to pierce my eyebrow and/or get a tattoo in college and could just never afford it. I would have gotten a black sun on my lower back, in case you're wondering...(Good thing I didn't do it because Doug says he wouldn't have married me if I had a tattoo. And the eyebrow ring would have just been lame.)


3a. At my wedding dinner, my brother Brandon told my future in-laws that I had a tattoo.....on my bum. I'm pretty sure they still wonder about that...


4. I wore a black shirt almost every day of my Junior and Senior year of High School and I wasn't even Goth! (Though I did paint my nails black on occasion...and blue, green, white, red, purple...)


5. I MUST put my colorful-Ikea-kid-plates in rainbow order when I unload the dishes. If Doug unloads, I'll go back and re-stack them in the correct sequence. Same goes for the cups and bowls.


6. Now that I wear colors other than black, I put the clothes in my closet in rainbow order also. And they have to be on black plastic hangers.

6a. Despite my many obsessive organizing tendencies, I'm a very cluttery person.


7. My favorite color is black but I tell people it's green so they don't ask questions.


8. I deleted 8. It wasn't that weird.


9. I'd MUCH rather work in the yard pulling weeds than clean the house...


9a. although, I will clean the house willingly if I can listen to Erasure really loud or if I have a good book-on-C.D. to listen to.


10. When I realized Doug was stealing/usurping my black plastic hangers once, I beat him with one. Soundly. (His are dark green.) (He told me to add this one.)

11. My second toe is longer than my big toe on both feet. (That's not so much weird as gross.)


12. I started dying my hair at a very young age (13ish) and, therefore, don't really know what my natural color is. (I blame my mom for this because she described my hair color as either "dirty blond" or "dish-water blond" when I was little. I'm sure she'll deny it though...)


12a. I've never found a grey hair on my head, (even when the color starts to grow out) but a few days ago I found a pure white eye lash.


13. If given the opportunity (which I never am) I could sleep for 12 hours straight. Make that 14.

14. I'm the youngest of 5 kids and yet, amazingly, I'm not the least bit spoiled!

15. When I was 19, I had a nightmare about my nephew falling off a balcony. Ever since then I've been afraid of heights and it's gotten 1,000 times worse since having kids...and visiting the Empire State Building.


16. In Middle School my life goal was to have 10 kids AND run my own day care center. (HAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!)

17. I can't let Doug end our phone conversations. If he tries to hang-up first I find something else to talk about for a minute and then I tell him I've got to go and hang-up.

18. I had a 76-year-old German roommate named Ursula when I lived at "The Old Mill" in college.

19. I would send a Christmas card to every person I've ever known if I had their address. (In the hopes of getting one back and hopefully seeing their picture. I'm insanely curious, nosey, and sentimental.)

20. Pondering or thinking too deeply about things of an infinite nature gives me an instant anxiety attack and has ever since I was about five-years-old and my sister Karie told me "space doesn't end" while we were sleeping outside on the trampoline.

I could go on, but I'm starting to frighten myself...


Happiness:


1. Having things in rainbow order.


2. My super comfy bed with its Space Foam mattress topper.


3. Sleeping in.


4. My boys sleeping in.


5. "Softer Than Air" socks from Costco


5a. Shopping at Costco


6. 80's Alternative Music


7. When my boys show their sweet side and/or play nicely together.

8. McDonald's Hot Fudge Sundae's. With or without nuts.

8a. When Doug buys me one spontaneously.


9. Eating really yummy food. Especially when someone else cooks it.


10. Travel.


11. Art.

12. Making pottery and/or taking art classes.


13. Surprise gifts.

14. Earning money.


15. Carlsbad, CA

15a. Living in, visiting, or day-dreaming about Carlsbad, CA.


16. The weather in Carlsbad and surrounding areas.


16a. Sunny and warm days with a cool breeze.


16b. Having a sun tan (it's been a few years.)


17. Sleeping-in while in Carlsbad, CA.


18. Doug (except when he makes me really really mad.)


19. Exploring the East Coast.

20. Watching my stomach undulate.

20a. No longer having morning sickness.

21. Uninterrupted reading time and a really great book.

22. Uninterrupted reading time with my husband and a really great book.

23. Clean, sweet-smelling little boys.

24. Chocolate 25. Did I mention sleeping?

26. People who make me laugh.


TAG! You're all "IT"

"Music and Lyrics"

Since yesterday was Valentines Day, (and let's face it, Valentines Day is mostly for chicks) I got to choose how we would celebrate. (Oh, and it's still my birthday month so I can still do whatever I want...sorta.)

I decided to use my limited power to see a chick flick in the theater. Now, generally, this is the type of movie Doug will watch with me once it comes out on video...and once we've seen all the other big blockbusters that came out around the same time.

When and if we do go to the theater, which is rarely, it's to see something a little more action oriented. (The last one I remember seeing with Doug: Mr. and Mrs. Smith.)

So last night, my personal Cupid gallantly and without complaint, accompanied me to see Music and Lyrics with Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore. (Despite the fact that he can't stand Ms. B-more.) He even pre-bought the tickets on-line and arranged for the babysitter so I didn't have to do a thing.

Now, before I read any reviews or hear the opinions of any of my smart friends, I'd just like to say that WE LOVED THE MOVIE!!! That's right, BOTH of us. Now, if I had to pick it apart academically, I could find plenty of flaws.

But I DON'T WANNA!

All I'm gonna say is, it had fabulous 80's elements, lot's of humor, and it was CLEAN! I didn't have to cringe through a s.e.x scene and there were no gratuitous F-words thrown in for shock value. Although I don't have the same emotional attachment to Hugh as I do to John Cusack, he's second on my list of favorite male actors. After all, he has an English accent, he's a great actor and he was AWESOME in this part.

In conclusion, I give the movie, and Valentines Day, two thumbs up!!!

I HEART FEBRUARY!!!

*P.S. Thanks for the awesome Valentine, Felix. I LUFF it!

Six Months Down, 55 Pounds To Go...

Dear Blog,
I am now 6 months into my third pregnancy and growing rapidly. The first few months of nausea and vomiting --which kept my weight gain minimal-- are now being generously off-set by a recent accelerated, but not unfamiliar, craving. The craving now threatening to take over every moment of my free time and cause a 75 pound total pregnancy weight gain is for....
sugar.

Now, sugar and I have always had a bit of a love/hate relationship. (Cue song: "I Love to Hate You" by Erasure.) As a hypoglycemic, any sugar over-dose I may indulge in generally ends in pain and suffering. Or more specifically, extreme lethargy and crankiness which is mostly painful to those around me. Of course, if my sugar indulgence happens to coincide with an empty stomach, vomiting and coma are the likely and usual results.

So imagine my glee when during my first four months of this pregnancy, the very thought of ice cream made me sick and all I wanted (if I wanted anything at all) were large chunks of red meat followed by any artery-clogging, heart attack-inducing side dish. (Read: French Fries)

Lucky me! This meant my baby was getting plenty of protein (and sodium and fat, but whatever...) and I didn't have to feel guilty for eating more servings of dessert than of vegetables on a daily basis!

Alas, all that has changed and my longing for the sweet stuff has taken over both mind and body. Currently, sugar in almost any form will do. If my body tells me to eat a spoonful (or three) of brown sugar, I just do it. Obviously, if I'm craving it, it's because the baby needs it! (Why else would I have ever craved tuna fish or egg salad?)

Unfortunately, more and more often lately, Baby and body have become more demanding. Although a handful of chocolate chips or large chunk of frozen cookie dough can partially satisfy, often I find a desperate need for something more. Something, in fact, homemade and baked.

It seems in the last week or two, not a day goes by when I don't have the desire to bake some divine dessert. Usually, the only thing that can stop me is still having left-overs from the last bake fest or lack of a key ingredient. This is why in the last few days I've consumed approximately 10 sugar cookies (all yesterday morning at a birthday party) half of a Chocolate Mousse Cake and at least 38 Lemon Bars. It's also why, now that I've polished off the last of the Lemon Bars, I'll be making Tollhouse Cookie Bars this afternoon. (I'm only writing to you, Dear Blog, because the butter needs to soften.)

Don't pity me. Although I'm sacrificing my health and sweet temper, it's all for the greater good: I'm keeping Baby #3 happy and satisfied. If you'd like to show your support, please join me as I gorge myself into yet another coma. Here's a little help to get you started:

Best Lemon Bars Ever

Crust:
1 cup butter or margarine, softened
1/2 cup powdered sugar
2 cups flour

Filling:
4 eggs, beaten
2 cups granulated sugar
1/2 cup lemon juice
5 Tbsp. flour
1 tsp. baking powder

Crust: Beat butter, powdered sugar, and 2 cups flour together until smooth. Spread into a greased 9x13 pan; bake at 350 for 20 minutes.

Filling: Beat together the eggs, granulated sugar, lemon juice, 5 Tbsp. flour, and baking powder until well blended; the mixture will be thin. Pour over the top of the baked crust, and continue baking at 350 for 25 minutes. Sprinkle with powdered sugar, cool, and cut into bars.

I'll let you know how the Tollhouse Cookie Bars turn out! Happy eating!

Birthday Do's and Dont's

DO stay up late on your birthday-eve reading Newsweek. You'll regret it in the morning but the quiet, uninterrupted reading time is worth it.

DON'T let your 5-year-old get sick causing lots of extra laundry

DON'T schedule your kids check-ups for your birthday especially when they both need SHOTS

DO take yourself to Denny's for a French Toast brunch (after Doctor's appointments) and let your kids both order their own meal from the kids menu. (No forced sharing means no fighting.)

DO order hot chocolate (instead of water) because, doggone it, you're worth it!

DO keep your bowel-control-challenged 5-year-old home from school and force both boys to take naps.

DO turn off the ringer on the phone so YOU can take a nap.

DO order Chinese for dinner so neither you nor your husband has to cook.

DO NOT order Chinese from a new place in a different town without telling your husband who drives to the old one first.

DO eat as many servings of dessert as you want and blame it on the baby.

ENJOY!!!

Why Do I Love February?

Because it's my BIRTHDAY MONTH!!! And when it's my birthday month, I might get unexpected GIFTS!

Like yesterday for example! I came home from picking up Max at preschool to find an Amazon box on the porch. Max took it inside and excitedly asked who it was for.

Knowing I hadn't ordered anything I said, "Probably Daddy..." and started to put it aside. But it IS my birthday month so I took a peek and saw MY name!

"Hmm." I thought, "Maybe Doug bought something but used my account so it came to me. I probably shouldn't open it.

Then again, it has my name on it...what if it really is for me from someone else?

But then, what if it's from Doug and it's for my birthday and it's supposed to be a surprise and it's not supposed to have come with my name on it???

Well, I guess that's not my problem because it DOES have my name on it!

That's it...I'm opening it! If it's supposed to be a surprise, too bad!!!"

(During your birthday month you are entitled, nay, EXPECTED to be a Birthday Brat!)

So, with Max looking on, I opened it to find a beautiful children's book. "Classic Fairy Tales" Illustrated by Scott Gustafson. The Amazon invoice had a note from one of my best friends* and bridesmaids saying it was an illustrator she loved and thought I would love too. (She obviously knows me well and knows I'm OBSESSED with children's books.)

She was right. The illustrations are awesome!!! It is beautiful. And it really was a birthday present for me and I really was justified in opening it!!!

When Doug came home we both perused it together and even looked up the artist on-line to learn more about him. I'm holding it even as I type. (I may or may not allow my children to touch it with their grubby mitts in the future, but not just yet.)

Awesome friends...another reason I LOVE FEBRUARY!!!

*This same friend (along with two others) made the week of my 17th birthday one of the best I've ever had. They went above and beyond the call of duty by kidnapping me (complete with face masks for them and a blindfold for me) to take me out to eat, decorating my house when I was gone one day, and showering me with gifts. This was when I had only lived in California for two months and was still desperately missing my life and friends in SLC, UT.

You rock Wahine! I Love you!!!