Sep 25, 2013

A Really Long, Boring, Journal Entry About NOT Having a Baby

"Man plans, God laughs."

I was supposed to have a brand new baby boy today.  I was supposed to check in to the hospital yesterday morning at 7 a.m. where they would start me on Pitocin and get this party started.

BUT sometime after six, after responding to my "good luck!" texts from friends, after showering and putting make up on, after Doug had packed the car with every conceivable thing the two of us might need for the next two days, my Dr. called.  My phone was charging and I missed her call so I had a message.  Just before walking out the door I heard that the hospital was too busy and I'd need to reschedule.

Frantic phone calls ensued trying to get in touch with her (my Dr.) and then the hospital.  One hospital nurse said they'd have room for us later in the day after two mom's went home.  But then the Day Shift Nurse put the kibosh on all that.  NOT TODAY!  AND MAYBE NOT TOMORROW--WE HAVE TO HOLD ROOMS FOR WOMEN WHO COME IN ACTUALLY IN LABOR! (subtext: YOU WIMP WHO'S BEING INDUCED A WEEK EARLY FOR NO GOOD REASON!  EVERY PREGNANT WOMAN IN THIS CITY GETS PRIORITY OVER YOU!)
(Why oh why don't people consider ginormous babies a good enough reason for induction?!)

Well HHMPFH!  So much for being responsible and trying to plan ahead!  In some cases this type of planning is rewarded, ya know...!?!?!

So, we got the boys off to school, and little Gray begrudgingly off to preschool, and while Grandma Dub stayed to have a swim, Doug and I went off to drown our sorrows in Mexican hot chocolate at Pipes.  It could have been a relaxing day!  No kids, two foot-loose and fancy-free lovebirds with an unexpected empty day?  But when you're self employed, and you've taken time off to have a baby, and then there's no chance of having said baby, well--you're just losing money and wasting a day-off.

At 10:45 I went to my previously scheduled then cancelled Dr. appt.
2.5 cm dilated.
She stripped my membranes.
(Want to know what that means you'll have to Google it.  I try to keep it PG around here.  Oh, and maybe try Web MD before you watch a YouTube video.  Just sayin'..)

I hoped that that would start labor, but to help things along, we went shopping.  Lots of walking!
We went to the baby store and bought 5 more things.  We went to Target and bought Gabe and Gray gifts that will be from Baby Brother.  We walked and walked.

Then we went home and I jumped on the trampoline until I was on the verge of peeing my pants.  (Turns out trampolines are super painful at 39 weeks.)
At least it amused Doug.

And then, because we still have all these OTHER children, we had to go back to real life.  Homework for the big three with little Gray trying to be as distracting as possible--as per normal.   (Until he was finally given the i-pad  with password entered--then he happily disappeared to flip from game, to Pixar movie, to Netflix kid show and back again.  If that doesn't cause more ADD in this family, I don't know what will.) You'd think with three adults to help it would be easier.  It wasn't.  Homework just plain stinks.

Finally, homework was completed and we all loaded up to head to Rubios for "Taco Tuesday".  One dollar off Original Fish Tacos!!!  We met my sister and her family there, and then just happened to run into our good friends and neighbors from England.  Hannah and Lee and their three boys.

Hannah had a baby one month ago at the same hospital.  And had a similar situation.  Was scheduled to be induced early in the morning, (one week early--because baby was measuring so large) was headed out the door when the hospital called and they were told to come tomorrow.  The same hospital that told them in their tour; "We ALWAYS have PLENTY of room...!!!"
Whatever.  She labored for two days and had a beautiful ten-pounder named Thomas (the Tank).
I suppose it was worth the wait, but STILL...!

Around this time, I started keeping track of my contractions.  After about 2 hours, I could safely say they were coming every ten minutes.  Sometimes quicker.  Sister Laura was convinced last night was the night.  I wasn't sure.  They were steady, and some were pretty close, but they weren't intense.  I'm a big wuss about pain, so I'm on high alert for "intense".  Intense means painful and I flee to the hospital at the first sign of any pain.  No intensity so even though they seemed to be getting closer as the night went on, after an episode of "Castle", I decided to go to bed.

At 2:20 am I woke up.  I'd managed to sleep at least 4 hours without a contraction hard enough to wake me up.  I tried to go back to sleep, but of course my mind wouldn't shut down.  After awhile, I realized I hadn't felt the baby kick for awhile.  I started to poke and prod my stomach.  No response.  Usually when I get up in the night, Baby wakes up too and starts his kick-boxing routine.  Not this time.

Finally, my worries got the best of me and I woke up Doug.  "Decreased fetal movement!  Let's go!"

We drove to the hospital, we had to walk in through Emergency where everyone could tell just by looking at me that I was NOT in labor.  "I haven't felt the baby kick for awhile.  I've had three with the cord around their necks so I'm a little nervous."

About the time they got me into the bed and hooked up to monitors, contractions had slowed to a crawl and Baby Brother was, of course kick boxing again.

"BUT!"  Nurse lady says, "Things are looking really good for you tomorrow at five!  Assuming we don't have any more moms come in!!!"

*sigh*  Rookie mistake.  Walk of shame out of the hospital and back in bed by 5 a.m.

It's now 10:00 a.m.  Gray is with his buddy David.  Boys are at school.  Grandma and Doug went to the beach to visit with the ocean.

And I'm sitting here all alone.  Not contracting.  Not even trying to keep track any more.  They're not intense.  What's the point!?

My new check-in time is tonight at 5 p.m.  IF L&D doesn't get too busy again.  In which case, well, I'm low priority.  I can wait.  And wait.

This is officially the longest I've ever had to wait--longest I've ever been pregnant.  I've always been at least a week early.  This baby is trying to teach me patience already.  Hope I can learn my lesson quick and we can get this show on the road as soon as possible!!!

Wish me luck--and patience!  I clearly need it!!


No comments: